Reorganization
We're doing a little bit of tweaking around here so if you see weirdness… well weird stuff that's out of the ordinary.. hang in there, we're working on it!
Paris Hilton Truly Punished
Paris Hilton has lost her 60 million dollar inheritance. Now she's really been punished.
Her grandfather, the one with all the money, has decided that she gets nothing. He's selling the company and giving the money to charity. Good for you pops!
He is said to be tired of Paris Hilton's antics and embarassed that she has marred the Hilton name with her sex tape, DUI and 23 day jail sentence last month.
Poor Paris. No, literally, poor Paris.
——————-
Update: TMZ is reporting that this widely reported news story about Paris Hilton is not true. Who knows what to believe. 
 I shouldn't have really said 'Poor Paris' above because the girl still has more money than I'll ever see in my lifetime. She's selling her house now, asking price is over $4 million and only pre-screened buyers can even make offers on it.  Word is it's way overpriced anyway. I guess Paris hasn't heard of the housing market slump.. or more than likely it's not really an issue when you're talking homes worth millions. I wonder who will buy Paris' tacky pink palace?
Student Strangles Teacher After Being Loud In The Bathroom
A student in Malaysia who strangled his teacher after she reprimanded him for being loud in the bathroom MIGHT get suspended.
The 17 year old student was told to do squats with 3 other boys after he was found being noisy with a group of boys in the school bathroom. The student ignored the teacher and headed back into the bathroom. The 28 year old teacher grabbed his wrists but he pushed her hands away and then shoved her up against a wall and began to choke her.
The teacher suffered bruising around her throat and some other injuries. School officials say they are looking into the incident to decide if they will suspend the student.
Wow… that's harsh. It could end up on his PERMANENT record. 88|
I would not teach school… not for any amount of money. Kids are out of control!
A Dumb Blonde Walks Into A Library…
Stop me if you've heard this dumb blonde joke before 
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Abs of Steel?
I can't help but laugh at this video…what was the expected outcome?
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Round Up Of RIdiculousness
Since todya is Walter's 3rd birthday and we're busy celebrating I'm going to do a round up of ridiculous news stories and let you draw your own conclusions for today 
Michael Vick sued by an inmate for about a kajillion dollars in a hand written lawsuit
This one is so embarassing because it's local to me:
Clemson University studies the 5 second ruleÂ
Oh wow, this one has a video too…
Three guys try to steal an ATM, but forget it's bolted to the floor. Umm.. someone also please tell these idiots that cash is not manufactured inside of ATM machines either… Â
24 year old strikes 93 year old man repeatedly in the head with a soda can, and knocks him unconscious.. then gets shot in the throat by the 93 year old when he wakes up. He tells police he got what he deserved. I'd have to agree.Â
Oh for heaven's sake.. get over it! Man sues McDonald's for 13 cents.
Idiot sent to jail for destroying surveillance camera, even after he explains to police that he "didn't like the way it was looking at him"
Sheriff's Deputy assaults, arrests NC couple for displaying American flag upside down
TV Stations Get Some Nasty Call Letters
The FCC has given call letters to two television stations that seem… well… filthy.
Get this.. In Maui the call letters KUNT were given to a low power digital station that is under construction. I can hear it now: Live from the KUNT-Watch Action News Center… KUNT was on the scene…. KUNT caught all the live action…. Well. You get the picture, unfortunately.
In Arizona, a new station is to be called KWTF. 
Â
KWTF is going on with the FTC letting these slip through?
KM Communications owns both the stations and requested the call letters in both cases. The VP of the company says he "fell asleep on the job" when requesting the call letters.
No word on if or when KUNT Action News will debut.
Someone Stole A Pool and The Water In It
Now this is strange.. not that Daisy Valdivia's pool was stolen out of her backyard in the quiet neighborhood she lives in, but that the pool and the 1,000 gallons of water in it were taken without a drop being spilled!
Wednesday morning the hip-high and 10-foot diameter pool and all the water that was in it had vanished. They estimate that the theft happened sometime between 1am and 5am and there is no evidence to indicate that the water was pumped out, drained anywhere closeby.. and who could drink 1,000 gallons of water?
The thief or thieves didn't take the two grills, chairs or umbrellas that were also out there… just the kids' swimming pool.
Obviously someone put some thought into this… and as funny as it is in one way, it's sad in another because these kids don't have their pool anymore.
As to how the pool was moved with the water in it.. or what happened to the water? That, and the current location of the pool remain a mystery.
Absolutely True Has Been Translated!
We recently had the opportunity to interact with The Translator at Rosetta Rants. We sent in a postcard and the Translator himself posted it and attempted to translate us at his site.
Our postcard appears in his collection here.
It's a really neat project called 'Postcards From the Edge' and people from all over are asked to send in a postcard from their location pointing out the three dubyas from where they're at!
W:Â Wonderful
W:Â Wacky
W:Â Worthless
For my worthless I chose my local police and The Translator wonders why. Hmmm.. well here's one case in point: My Local Dingbat Sheriff
That's just one of many little irritations and embarassments by the local piggy pies. I'm sure there will be further rants about their incompentency – Watch this space! 88|
Thanks to Rosetta Rants and The Translator, first of all for entertaining us daily with lively quirkies, funnies and puzzles and secondly for featuring our postcard in your collection.
Nicole Richey Sentenced To 96…. Hours?
Nicole Richey appeared in court today to face charges of DUI for the second time.
The judge sentenced her to 96 hours in jail.. that's 4 whole days.. but she gets 6 hours knocked off for time already served. She'll pay $2,048 in fines and be on probation for 3 years. She's also going to have to complete a drug and alcohol program for second offenders.
The judge warned her that if she violated probation she could be sentenced to a year in jail. I'm sure she doesn't want to have her baby in jail or be away from her little one once it is born so hopefully she'll keep her nose clean from now on!
