I'll Smack You With a Sandwich

How’s that for a bizarre threat?

Actually, I’ve never smacked anyone with a sandwich. Not yet anyway. That’s not to say I haven’t kicked a pizza across the room at anyone in a fit of anger, but I digress.

The reason I bring up someone being assaulted with a sandwich is because it recently happened in Port St Lucie.

A 19-year-old guy allegedly hit his girlfriend with a sandwich while she was driving. The sandwich knocked her glasses off and nearly caused them to have a terrible crash.

After being arrested and charged with domestic battery and child abuse (the couple’s 7-month-old son was in the car), the guy said that he did not want to hit his girlfriend, so he merely threw the sandwich at her instead.

I can understand that logic. However, in the case of the kicked pizza, no one was driving and no child was put in danger.

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Comments

9 Responses to “I'll Smack You With a Sandwich”
  1. Barb Cooper says:

    It’s very discouraging that the guy has already procreated.

  2. Tiffany says:

    I assume your next post will be a detailed description of the pizza-kicking incident?

  3. Anonymous says:

    Barb: I have to agree. He’s 19, hopefully he will grow out of the reckless asshole phase.

    Tiffany: Well, I hadn’t planned it, but if there is popular demand for the supreme pizza kick story…

  4. My brother in law got close, he threw his Subway against the wall during an argument.

  5. MrCorey says:

    Threw a Subway??? And he wasn’t arrested? I hope that somebody picked it up. That thing was made by an artist!

  6. nvxiao says:

    With a Sandwich Smack:)

  7. Trukindog says:

    You kicked the greatest food known to man, YOU KICKED A PIZZA ! I’m sure eventually I’ll forgive you for such a terrible TERRIBLE HEINOUS ACT !

    Just knowing this has traumatized me…I need another BEER. :)

  8. Anonymous says:

    Trukindog – you gotta forgive me.. it was an insane moment inspired by a teenager. I’m sure you can understand. It won’t happen again.

  9. AMpm says:

    I actually had a friend who through icecream at his sister (they are both over the age of 18, but still fight alot) and a police officer happened to see it. She pressed charges and he was arrested for assault with icecream. Yes, I made fun of him plenty.

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